Purple Blue Dark Orange

Ryan Millios They got on my head, 1585 days ago, January 11, 2015 with a hard wake up nudge! I felt like I was in a place of comfort, a place that cared about me! As tho I was in suspension! I was in a warm orange glowing place & did feel a lot of love in a state of being & existing! Then all I saw was purple, blue & dark, purple, blue & dark, purple, blue dark flashing in my eyes in a tunnel, I was moving thru a tunnel, as to it were a train tunel! This lasted for about a year! My hearing was really sensitive, still is! My sinus when clear is really sensitive too but typically is swollen! I was experiencing allergies too, & pressure on my head from allergies! I saw another wight light, from the bright orange yellow light I was in! When I came back, I was reallly depressed & crying all the time! This seemed like I had a memory of my own birth possibly! I went thru my brain rushing really fast, the thoughts were racing & racing fast after this happened! I felt like talking & sharing everything, even tho those around me were telling me something is rong with me for the way I am! My own dad, of all people, rejecting me, telling me to seek mental treatment, because I picked up a video camera, to record myself crying! Dad wrote my husband, here on facebook, telling him mental illness runs in our family, poisoning my husband against me! My dad has blocked me for several years. I made a video burning a tshirt, & my dad was telling me people were going to call the police because I was burning a tshirt! Yet he burned leaves in his yard all the time since I was kid! My dad also said my son was suicidal, when he was at joint base lewis, when he was writing lyrics on facebook of a song. Like an idiot, I called the mps, & my son has been mad at me for several years! My current partner, yelling & screaming at me, one night, I came out to the living room to record a video! He comes out, is yelling & screaming at me, telling me I need to go back to bed, because being up at night is just not right! Now this is from a man, who worked graveyard shift! Why does it matter, if I am up for an hour in the middle of the night, being a grown assed adult, talking to the camera because I can't sleep or its something I just want to do as journaling? My old ogre would get up in the night & eat, after he came home from afternoon shift & graveyard! If I had a baby, & was up in the middle of the night, taking care of a baby, that is perfectly acceptable! Moms never truly sleep well, since we always hear the baby & are tuned in to noises! They have built factories & warehouses close to where we live, & I hear the pumps, & churning noises!

My dad, worked for a hospital, spewing medical propaganda on facebook! It looks to me now for their own job creations, which is not affordable for me!

When I lived on Fort Riley, my dad was telling me in 2001, there were all these medical jobs since they were the future & there was a big need for medical jobs! He was telling me to come up to Iowa & live! The problem is I as not able to find a job, that paid more than $8.25 an hour! How was I supposed to buy a house ever? Back in 2001, they were closing down factories to another country!

Even my dad, admitted in 2008, his hospital had them in funds that were dropping, for employee/employer matching wall street! Yet he was watching his funds drop, money he was contributing, to get the matching from the employer! I have to wonder, since he worked for the hospital, if they were investing in hospital & medical device funds? How come the hospital just doesn't take out a loan from a bank? How is an employee benefit, a benefit, when they take the money back, thru wall street money from the employee, & employer? How is that an investment & cost sharing to employees, when they are watching a limited amount of fund options drop as they are contributing?

I just can't see how wall street is fair for everyone & invests in all americans! I've probably lost more money in wall street, than I made!

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